Sunday, February 23, 2014

What bankruptcy does to your marriage - Part 3

Imagine preparing yourself for a move to a new house that is bigger and better than your current house?  Imagine the excitement that pours into the work of packing and cleaning while waiting for the move?  Then think of what it would be like to have to pack and clean because your house is being taken away from you and having to come up with the energy to do all of this while your heart is breaking!  Moving is not much fun when you really want to move so think of how awful it is when you are forced to move.

We had a sale a week before we were to make the big move and sold so many things that I had collected over the years.  It was so hard for me to see it all go but I knew I had to do it.  Moving was going to cost some money and we did not have any so I needed sell my things to make it.  We also had no place to store most of our stuff.  We rented a garage down the street from where we were going to be living but it was not big enough to fill the contents of a six room house plus a basement filled with things.  For me, these were just things and I had to let them go.  For my husband, he just could not let anything he had go!  It was so hard for him!

All week long I kept telling my husband that he needed to make arrangements for moving.  He needed help and he needed a moving van.  He kept telling me not to worry about it but I was.  I worked so hard all week packing, cleaning and throwing away, morning, noon and night.  Finally the day came where we had to move and there was no moving van arranged, no help arranged and no real plan!  It was like my husband was moving in slow motion and there was nothing I could do to change that!  I was so utterly frustrated with him that I could not see straight! Instead of us working together, we were not even speaking to each other.  I kept telling him to go through his things and start packing them up, but he did not pack up any of his belongings.  He is so very picky about his "stuff" that no one dare touch it so this was something he needed to do on his own.  So, the day we were supposed to be moving, he was going through his stuff!  There was no margin for error here.  The bank would be there at 9:00 the next morning to collect the keys!

That day was such a blur to me because I was crying the entire day!  I moved as many boxes as I was able and did as much as I could to help.  At one point, my husband told me to leave because all we were doing was arguing with each other.  I found something else to do and went back about 6:00 that night, thinking that everything was almost done.  To my total and utter amazement, it looked like nothing had been touched since I left over 6 hours before.  I was in a total state of panic!  He just was not getting the job done!  This was a total nightmare!

By the next morning, I went back over to the house and once again started packing more things into the car to move.  I knew the bank would be there at 9:00 and they were.  Emotionally, I could not handle the turning of the keys over so I had to leave.  My husband must have negotiated something with them to give him more time to move things out of the basement (because the basement was still full).  My sister came over and asked how she could help and I had no idea what to tell her.  She saw that all my Christmas decorations were still in the basement and I told her I had to just leave them because I did not have the energy to move them.  She told me that she was not about to let me lose my Christmas decorations and proceeded to move everything out.

Finally, we were moved out!  But how was this marriage going to be saved?